Monthly Archive for January, 2010

Let there sort of be rock

Published on January 26, 2010 in Joyce Carol Oates is real. 3 Comments

Last night I went to see Anvil. They’ve been around and unknown for some thirty years until a documentary brought them fame at fifty. I haven’t seen the movie. Steve “Lips” Kudlow said at the show that metal was a timeless music and would never go away “because people have never heard of it.”

I’m dog-sitting this week. The dog must be walked, which really brings it home how little I am in charge of my cats. With their auto-feeder and auto-litter, they are more like roommates who barf on my floor. (I had a human roommate who would do this.) The dog likes to get its little paws muddy and smell found turds, which is unlike any roommate I have ever had. I do like walking the dog because it allows me the chance to be neighborly and wave at joggers and people in cars.

Today I’m looking through Joyce Carol Oates’s bibliography to find the work with the funniest name. She has written approximately seven hundred novels. So far the winner is After the Wreck, I Picked Myself Up, Spread My Wings, and Flew Away. That’s a cool title and it’s for a YA novel. I love Joyce Carol Oates. I would ask her to move in with me but she would get up at four in the morning to walk the dog and they would both come back covered in brambles, needing to get hosed off.

I made some breakfast rolls from last night’s dinner roll dough (so transformed with a cinnamon/sugar/butter glaze). They came out okay but the dough could have stood to rise more. Maybe I proofed the yeast too long. It is taking me a long time to figure bread out.

Who is Bozo Texino?

Published on January 23, 2010 in Cool. 2 Comments

Thinking about Colossus of Roads today. I saw his tag twice on cars in Texas. Excited to learn that someone made a documentary about the secret hobo jungles.

Today’s a work day. My elbow is messed up from dancing last night. The Austin club scene involves a man in a white suit laying face-down in the street while a camera crew films him, drawing no crowd.

and and and

Published on January 21, 2010 in Five Things, stories and team discovery. Closed

Everybody’s favorite Mary Hamilton won Rose Metal Press’ chapbook contest with her short short collection WE KNOW WHAT WE ARE. That finalist and semi-finalist list is quite the list. I can’t wait to see Mary’s work in lovely RMP style.

This summer I contributed to the playlist up at Wigleaf and forgot about it until it was posted today. And. My book release date got pushed up to August or September.

who's there

Also the winners of the Five Things contest A New Year are posted over there. I’m looking forward to the show. I don’t know who most of these people are. And. I made a poster.

Kim Parko’s incredible Cure All is out at Caketrain. Of it I wrote, “To call these pieces unique isn’t enough. With her fractured shards of advice, sweet little nightmares, tunneled eyes and sprouted scales, Kim Parko presents a twisting puzzle of fire blights and lonely spines. This book will crawl into your house.” It’s weird that it’s only $8.

Mucus brain

Published on January 20, 2010 in Teaching and Total Wreck. Closed

Today I feel like a surgeon in Novolazarevskaya. I was on monster deadline Monday and it seeped into Tuesday. Today is some threats writing and comparing newspapers to wet babies. My face itches.

I need to update my syllabus for class Sunday. My friend is doing a food writing semester, brilliant, but I might head towards current events reading regardless. Read some newspapers, think some thoughts. I’m still curious to know what my students think about The Facebook.

PRIVET

Cedar. The scientists wonder how one human being could produce so much mucus. I’ve been meaning to post this picture of a blood orange. The blood orange is the poet’s orange.

my face seriously itches

A power line exploded outside my house the other day. I don’t think there is a transformer on that line but to be fair I have no idea what a transformer is. I was on deadline and there was this explosion that sent a baby ball of fire past my window. I called the fire department and they said that nobody should stand under the wires, so I ran downstairs and yelled at a homeless dude who was stomping on the fire that had started by the pole, and he yelled back but in a playful way, and stomped the fire out and threw some branches around then stood by and made fun of all the bystanders, and rightly so, but I was worried about him under the live wires and everything. Nobody was killed and the city came and fixed the wires. (“The city came.” The taxpayer entity  personified into this one guy with a hardhat and a cherry-picker truck.)

Deathmatched in Dallas

Published on January 18, 2010 in team discovery. 3 Comments

there were four glasses of water

Now I am home. In Dallas I met fellow readers Will Clarke, Willy Razavi, and Katherine Center, plus Todd Zuniga and judges Ben Fountain and Tina Parker. (I already knew Owen but what the heck I’m on a linking frenzy.) I did not win (the rightful honor went to Will Clarke) but had a wonderful time regardless at the reading, dinner after that, and more good talks after that.

We accidentally checked out the Dallas club scene, which involves a girl lying on the ground and asking her boyfriend if he thinks she is hot. Boyfriend hefts her up, says “You are hot and I am going to need you to shut the fuck up.” This story is not about me.

I got up early and stood by the window drinking water. From the 20th floor of the Adolphus I saw that officers had closed off the streets below. Three horses stood in the center of the square and I was not sure if they were the attraction or merely backup.

While reading about the hotel—this was the kind of hotel you read about, or at least take its stationary—I learned that the old 19th floor ballroom had been stripped of its floors and sealed off permanently, accessible in two places: either by the roof, or by an unmarked door in an undisclosed location. I went exploring and found the door. It was a knowledge adventure and I was on Team Discovery. There was a padlock that wouldn’t budge with a few tugs so I went downstairs and had breakfast. Later I found some pictures. One neat thing is that there are rivets and not welds on the old beams.

After that I hung out with a baby and watched the Cardinals get creamed and spread on toast by the Saints. So ended my Dallas adventure. Thanks to Katie and Carolyn at the DMOA for hosting and helping, to Todd for inviting me, to the City of Dallas, and to whoever came up with the idea for the cinnamon roll.

Turn that change into foldin’ money

Published on January 14, 2010 in well anyway later. 3 Comments

I feel like I know Italian today. I’m eating roasted Brussels sprouts and typing about online education. I have 33 tabs open.

I preordered MLKNG SCKLS by Justin Sirois. I remember this summer I picked up Matthew Simmons in a rental car and drove him to his house, and as we were getting into the rental car he was telling me some convincing words about MLKNG SCKLS. It was sunny.

Also I ordered Aaron Burch’s chapbook HOW TO TAKE YOURSELF APART, HOW TO MAKE YOURSELF ANEW. PANK is contributing all proceeds from all sales (between now and 2/13/10) of the chapbook, and PANK 4 to the Red Cross and Médecins Sans Frontières.

Tonight I’m meeting with Stacy and others to do the last round of Five Things contest judging. We got some very strong and varied entries and I’m proud of Austin writers. Well anyway later.

If I owned a 24-hour Indian food restaurant I would call it Naan Stop

Published on January 10, 2010 in rue the blues. 6 Comments

The song about ruing the blues does exist on the internet! It is called, wait for it, “Rue The Blues” and it’s by Oakley Hall. You can hear it on their Myspace page. I feel silly that I searched for it wrong, but it’s worth it to find the song again and yes, to share it with you.

On Friday I’m doing a Literary Death Match in Dallas. Readers include Will Clarke (Dallas), William Razavi (San Antonio), and Katherine Center (Houston). I’m not sure what I’m going to read yet, but it could involve going for it and raising hell.

Let them eat foam

Published on January 8, 2010 in Cooking, questions and rue the blues. Closed

what is happened

I have this video all queued up to watch so I can learn how to make an angel food cake but I am too weirded out that it is called “Let Them Eat Foam” to watch it.

Last night it got down to 17ºF here. I headed under the covers and wrote some nonsense and then had terrible dreams. I don’t know how you cold weather clime dwellers (climers?) get anything done.

A month ago I was driving to my dentist appointment and I heard a song lyric that sounded like “you’ll never rue the blues like I do,” but now that I look it up, the song appears to not exist on the internet. I probably didn’t hear it right but I like the idea of ruing the blues.

Yesterday I made carne seca with my dad’s home-ground chili powder. It takes all day to make the stuff so I was happy it turned out. The chili powder had a good spice and tasted very fresh. Carne seca is a good source of your recommended daily orange fat requirement. I also did a King’s Cake which was good if a little low on filling. It rose properly, which is more than I can say for the other breads I tried this week. I’ve had to throw two loaves out the window for the birds.

Let’s say an officer is investigating a crime, and in the course of talking to a person of interest, he comes across a piece of potential evidence that belongs to that person. The officer could ask to keep that evidence, but he would need a warrant to legally remove it without the person’s approval, right? Related: How long does it take to get a warrant?

On major holidays in Texas, the cops set up no-refusal checkpoints complete with judges who will approve warrants right there to take your blood. I believe they arrested 24 people on New Year’s. Sleepy judges.

Once I figured out how to turn off the word count display in Word 2007 it  became much easier to type.

Truth in advertising

Published on January 6, 2010 in Total Wreck and Work. 6 Comments

I spent a piece of this morning in a cotton gown. After my checkup I was standing by the nurses’ station and looking at the big framed display of baby pictures. One of the nurses came by and asked me if I was picking out one of my own. I didn’t understand, so she pointed at the photos and asked if I was picking out one of the babies for myself. I didn’t want to insult the photo collage so I said Yes. Then, so she wouldn’t doubt my sincerity, I  added, “That would be great.” I went home and ate an avocado.

this is where avocados come from

I went to the mailbox in my robe to see if Sleepingfish had arrived. It had not. I am hopeful for tomorrow. My postal carrier is named Norman.

I’m looking sidelong at a story about a donut shop in Beaumont, TX. I knew when I wrote it that it didn’t have the real ending yet. Yesterday, I relocated the couple to a Days Inn.

all of them, in the world

Last week I ate a Texas-shaped waffle. The first ingredient on the syrup packet that accompanied it was corn syrup and the second was high fructose corn syrup.

There’s a ghost town in Arizona called Total Wreck. It is home to Total Wreck Mine, which made $500,000 in seven years and is casually a death trap to this day.

Good meowning

Published on January 1, 2010 in Adam Robinson, Dan Wickett, Reviews, Sasha Fletcher and stories. 4 Comments

what’s up 2010

I’m back in Texas. Last night we drank Johnny Walker Blue Label and walked home with the wind at our backs. Dick Clark is an animatron with a dual directive to kiss ladies and count backwards.

On the drive back from Tucson I read most of Elmore Leonard’s Escape From Five Shadows aloud. It was an early book, just his third novel, and it shows a bit in word repetition and other little things, but it’s a good book. It made me wonder about writing westerns. You have to write close enough to feel familiar with the genre but you can have too many suntanned faces peering out from under curled hat brims. Familiar but not too familiar.

My Christmas story is up at Everyday Genius, which was guest edited this month by Sasha Fletcher. The third paragraph used to be its own story, which I was calling “Things To Do With Fifty-Three Poinsettias.” It was kind of a downer so I condensed and re-appropriated. EWN said some nice things about the story. Thank you Sasha and Adam and Dan.

I’m excited to read the latest Sleepingfish, edited by Gary Lutz and Derek White and featuring a lineup I’m proud to be a part of, including Ryan Call, Anna DeForest, Sasha Fletcher, Nina Shope, Rachel May, David McLendon,  Eugene Lim, The Brothers Goat, Lito Elio Porto, Adam Weinstein,  Diane Williams, Dennis Cooper, Elliott Stevens, Tim Jones-Yelvington, Alec Niedenthal, Matt Bell, Eduardo Recife, David Ohle, Evelyn Hampton, Émilie Notéris, Ottessa Moshfegh, Cooper Renner, Christine Schutt, M. T. Fallon, Daniel Grandbois, Julie Doxsee, Terese Svoboda, Blake Butler, Stephen Gropp-Hess and Ali Aktan Askin. The cover looks great:

it is inside you

The new Sonora Review is also out and ready for order. It has a lovely cover and work from me, Colleen O’Brien, Steven Church, Michael Tod Edgerton, Amanda Warren, Joshua Robbins and more. Sonoran Desert represent.

creatures

Now I’m learning about the Corpus Days Inn where Selena was murdered. When MLK was shot in the Lorraine Motel they made it into a museum, but the Days Inn is still a Days Inn; they just changed the numbers on the doors.