Aaron and I just got back to Tucson. We logged over 2k miles on the car. My spine turned into a rod full of dough. Now I am going to attempt a recap so I can look back on it fondly when I start forgetting tomorrow, and so you can understand why I have been bad at returning emails.
DAY 1 Aaron and I learned that “or similar” means we get a Hyundai Accent and we drove into the desert. I asked him if he has ever seen rain. We listened to a woman say “Obamacare” on talk radio and drove over the pass into California and across the dunes and into San Diego. It is so beautiful in San Diego. You’re required by local law to say “it is beautiful here” three times an hour. We met up with Jim Ruland and his wife Nuvia, Lindsay showed up from the airport looking fresh, Adam Novy arrived and photographed the waitress, and we kicked off the tour with over 100 in attendance at Vermin on the Mount. We ate late-night lobster tacos and woke up to fruit and yogurt and coffee, at which point I realized I was in California.
DAY 2 cinnamon sprinkled in my coffee. We hit traffic on the way into Costa Mesa, where we got to spend much less time than I would have liked with my old friend Josh and his lady Brianna. Got in a shower and a little TV. I cut some threats into cards and arranged the cards. Lindsay and I did our makeup together and drank mai tais out of coffee cups. We got our Oaxacan food on at Guelaguetza with Jim and Nuvia, who helped us order the proper mole. LA traffic happened. We read at Vermin on the Mount at The Mountain Bar in Chinatown. Aaron read his suspenders story and Lindsay read the one about the baby what says “honey.” Lindsay and I got pensive and then we went to a bar with J Ryan Stradal and Sal Plascencia and friends. J Ryan took us home and gave us soft places to sleep under the Hollywood sign.
DAY 3 I found out that I like taking pictures of Lindsay right after she wakes up. J Ryan made coffee and we had pleasant talks on books and shows. After breakfast with Mike Alber and his wife Julie, we took the coastal highway and watched the fog burn off and played Girl Scout games. I drove the switchbacks and felt distinctly that we had entered a loop. At one point, we drove onto the beach on accident. We ended up in Santa Cruz, meeting my girl Sarah Faulkner and her man James just as they put burgers on the grill. Lindsay fell in love with their malamute, Demo. They got married on the beach. It was good to have a day without reading and we spent our evening absorbing the scenery and putting on pajamas and talking books.
DAY 4 we took Demo to a lighthouse and walked up the beach, then caravaned it into Lafayette. Sarah joined the party and we swam in the pool at her sister’s house before putting ourselves back together and heading into town for the reading. We had dinner with Jimmy Chen and Reynard Seifert and friends, then headed to the reading. Instead of introducing ourselves we picked out songs to introduce us, and Aaron read in a Lucha Libre mask and Lindsay read Meat From A Meat Man and I read the threats. We had a secret flask to avoid San Francisco’s bar prices. It was the day Prop 8 was overturned. We danced and found a guitar smashed in the street.
DAY 5 we all woke up rich in Lafayette. Lindsay had to go home and the rest of us ate Eggos and laid out by the pool. Sarah and I talked about memorable recipes we have made since we saw each other last. Aaron developed his first of two sunburns. We ordered a pizza and forgot we were on a book tour. Started to understand the intricacies of “California Gurls.” We took the train into town and read with Lauren Becker, Greg Gerke, Andrea Kneeland, and Adam Novy. Stephen Elliott and Ethel Rohan were in attendance, among others, and I felt heartened and hug life. We continued a trend of late-night Mexican food and caught the last train home. I put my most beautiful face on Sarah’s lap. We got to Lafayette and ate candy.
DAY 6 We said good-bye to Sarah and made the Sacramento drive. I snipped up our faux-polaroids to send out in the post and we met up with Elijah Jenkins to talk strategy and shoot guns before heading out for nachos and Chimay. Deena Drewis arrived in a striped dress, wearing a pendant featuring a bird absconding with a glass drop. I’m not sure if you have heard of and/or met any California girls, but I wish we could all be them. The night continued, with a reading that involved me standing on a chair to attempt to scream over some business networkers who had been double-booked at the venue. We gave up on the bar, but it was nobody’s fault, and really, best nachos of my life. Aaron and I left Sacramento at about midnight and made it to Reno at two in the morning. I curled up with the guts of a disassembled keyboard.
DAY 7 started with Eggs Benedict with Gabe Urza. We drove to his dad’s place and ate grapes. I drove south and met with my money words bosses for a lovely lunch while Gabe and Aaron embarked on a multi-hour float down a river. Our arms got twisted into experiencing delicious Basque cuisine in the shadow of the Harrah’s: vegetable soup, beef stew, bread, cheese, lamb chops dotted with crunchy garlic, bottles and bottles of wine. I amended my opinion of Reno. Jeremy said if he never saw a Chevrolet again he would be happy. We played blackjack for eight hours and learned how to do craps the hard way.
DAY 8 we learned that Ken Baumann, a writer friend of ours who is also on a television show, was having his 21st birthday party in North Hollywood. Since our other option was to take the lonely road through Vegas, we opted to take the 395 between Yosemite and Death Valley, which ended up being the kind of stunningly beautiful drive you can only take in for so many hours before you have to start ignoring it or else you end up stopping and living there and going to the gas station in your bare feet and pajamas to pick up a suitcase of beer. The drive went fast and we picked up some jerky for the birthday boy. J Ryan welcomed us into his home again and bought us supper and gave us scotch mixed with ginger beer and talked about how it’s important for children to see their parents emotionally invested in a thing. At the party, we met new and old friends, I heard about Houston architecture and amended my opinion of Houston. Nick Antosca kindly offered us a spontaneous home so we didn’t have to sleep in the car.
DAY 9 was the last long drive, we aspired to make it to Phoenix but pushed it on into Tucson. I destroyed a tumbleweed and gunned it past a dust storm. The scenery changed from one kind of desert to another. Now I’m in Tucson, listening to the dog sigh and my parents talk. I feel a connection with California that I haven’t felt since I was watching it from the inside of a Greyhound. We have one more reading, the one that inspired the whole trip, on the 11th in Tucson, and then home.










It’s good to be home. I came home and cleaned my kitchen and got a new phone to replace the one I busted on a wall in Boston. At home I found ten roses and a lot of work. I read a book and excavated my pores.